Before I learnt to control my feelings
I used to feed off others
Especially anger
When someone close was angry
I would think it was directed at me
Then I would eclipse their hurt
With my own
Instead of receiving sympathy
They suffered my pent-up rage
Without proper help
To recognise and understand
The power of my emotions
I created my own pragmatic solution
I found that I could keep my feelings
Locked inside a mental box
For years I was a model of self-control
But gradually I realised
That I was losing all my close friends
I don’t know you any more
Said one, when pressed
You never show your feelings
Are you depressed?
So one day, when alone
I summoned all my courage
And cautiously opened my box
To my utter devastation
It was empty
For the next few months
I lived in a daze. Lost!
I couldn’t think what to do
I kept going around in circles
As people do when they’re lost
Opening my box
Then closing it again in disbelief
But as I got used to the dark
I began to see sylph-like creatures
Withered, translucent
Cowering in the corners
That was when I knew
I needed help
And with that help
I turned my box into a womb
I nurtured my feelings
And as they emerged
I helped them mature
And express themselves
With clarity and calm
Now, I have a new box
Much bigger and better
And in it, we all live happily
Together
There is so much space
It is positively luxurious
We even have extra rooms
For other people’s feelings
You know,
When they spill over
No really!
It’s better than East Enders
And we sometimes get a hug
